I have a very specific idea of what I'd like when I stay at a hotel. I wouldn't say that I'm OCD in this way (no, I don't need the toilet paper folded with the little triangle). I just take a common sense approach. Is it too much to ask that the housekeeper or previous resident actually flushes the toilet, after all? Don't worry - this isn't a blog post about Mousekeeping leaving us a special surprise. That was Day 1. No, this is about something altogether more important. You see, I have an expectation or hope that "Mousekeeping" is the quiet partner in the vacation. The sheets get cleaned, the toilets get scrubbed, the towels replaced. And all the better if we can do this in complete anonymity. After all, I'm sure the mousekeeper is making judgments about us as they see our junk spread across the room. And I don't want to sick my wife on them...she is the Queen of Clean, after all.
My concern and complaint with Mousekeeping wasn't that we didn't get towels. It was timing. When we checked in, I was impressed that Disney took the extra step of asking us when we would like our room cleaned. I immediately went with the 10-12 option, knowing we would almost always be in the theme parks. Up to this point, though, our mousekeeping came calling right around the time we were trying to get the kids down for naps. Now, I'm not unrealistic. If they knocked and could see we were there, it wouldn't be a big deal. No, this particular day would just lead to some awkward moments. I'm jumping a bit ahead in the day, as another experience trying to take out Mousekeeping wagons was the start of Day 7.
When we got back for the kids naps, Mousekeeping arrived soon after. They knocked on the door and we didn't answer. After they knocked for the fifth time (apparently, she REALLY wanted to talk to us), she informed us that she needed to clean our room. The kids were hanging in there today, so we volunteered to go down and get some snacks at Concierge while she cleaned. I was slightly annoyed at the insistence...after all, it was 2:30 in the afternoon. But we went and I did what I do best. I plowed through three chocolate chip cookies and a Sprite. Long live vacations! 30 minutes or so later, we moseyed back to our room. When we walked in, I was surprised that our room hadn't been touched at all. No, she was still working on the room next to ours. So I got the kids into bed and was trying to settle them down. Knock, knock, knock. She was back. Captain Obvious stated that she hadn't cleaned our room yet. You don't say! She said that she just had a couple things to do...namely, the bathroom. I assumed that this would mean she would return later. Nope. A moment later, she was doing her bathroom thing. Nothing is more awkward that the Mousekeeper being in your room while you hang out on the bed. And true to the experience, she stayed for 20 minutes. I guess I should be grateful. It's like an extra souvenir. New towels with a pound of awkwardness. Let's just hope none of us used the bathroom right before. Then awkward would have been a welcome feeling!
But Mousekeeping was really the least of our worries on Day 7. The only reason it popped into my head was because we were actually in the room from 10-12. And Mousekeeping didn't arrive. But why on Earth would we be there in mid-morning? It's all Mickey's fault. Him and his breakfast pizza. As I stated in yesterdays blog, I made the trip planning mistake of having a late night followed by an early morning character breakfast. Indeed, this would be the last character breakfast that we had. Today, we were heading back to the Contemporary Resort to eat at Chef Mickey's. Lukas was really excited - this was Mickey's breakfast event! And the morning seemed to start easy enough. Miles and Lukas were in good spirits. We were a bit tired, but Contemporary Resort offered Mickey pictures. We headed off and arrive right on time. Okay, not really. We were ten minutes late but by Day 7, who is really counting?
We checked in and headed for our wonderful pictures with...a statue of Mickey! Really? We get to stand with a 4 foot version of Mickey holding a bowl of salad? Okay then. Smile for the camera, crew! And true to Disney character breakfast traditions, we moved from pictures right into another waiting area. We hung around for quite awhile. Miles seemed a little sleepier than I thought he would be, but was still in good spirits. We finally did get seated and Elisa and I went and got the kids their food. Strange on the menu would be Mickey's breakfast pizza. Gravy, eggs, bacon, sausage, all on pizza dough. I couldn't not have the kids try it! I got the kids situated and then I made the trek to get food for myself. As I was leaving, I realized the danger of letting Grandpa take the lead on Lukas' plate. Sure, he got him a pancake...it was the fact that it was drenched with chocolate sauce that might have led to a bit of questioning. At least I went with syrup on Miles' plate. His stomach wouldn't get upset.
When I arrived back at the table, Miles was teary. He came over and I asked him what was wrong. I asked him if his stomach was upset and he said yes. He said this as Lukas was ingesting a pancake covered with pure chocolate. Mr. Maple Syrup had an upset stomach. So I left my steaming plate of food and headed with Miles to the bathroom. We played the very exciting game of "Are you going to throw up?!" Miles would say no. Start to cry, and I would jump out of the way just in case. I think I scared away a couple patrons as my nails scraped against the walls trying to flee from possible throw up. Yet, nothing came. Miles started smiling again. I started wondering whether or not he just wanted to check out the facilities. After all, Lukas went through that phase. Maybe he was comparing soap dispensers.
Back we went to the table and I started trying to enjoy my now warm food. The joys of parenting. Miles went back to eating. Crisis averted. That is, until Miles got teary again. He came right back over and said his stomach hurt again. This time, instincts greater than trying to climb bathroom walls kicked in. I grabbed my napkin, positioned it like a cup (I know you're excited about the details), and Miles proceeded to vomit into the napkin. Whee! In a weird moment where I was both proud and ashamed of being proud, I kind of smiled. Not a drop hit the floor. Yep, when you become a parent your ideas of what constitutes "winning" slightly changed. When the kids were babies, it was a victory when they didn't pee directly into my face. Now, it's catching vomit in an open napkin without spilling.
Thus, I left my barely eaten breakfast and returned to the bathroom. Miles, it appeared, had gotten it out of his system. No more complaints about throwing up. He was hungry. He wanted chocolate. I should have let my Dad get him another plate. When we got back up to the table, Disney did come through in a way only they could. When we arrived, Mickey had already come to visit. Miles was going to be crushed. So Elisa calmly asked the server if we could get him back. I could tell he was getting ready to go on break (you can tell when a non-character cast member starts hovering like the Secret Service). But they whispered something into Mickey's eye (which was a slightly amusing sight) and Mickey U-Turned. Back he came for hugs and autographs with a wide eyed and excited Miles. I probably should have mentioned that Miles had thrown up, but it might have ruined the moment. I just kept that secret to myself.
With Miles throwing up adventures, though, we needed to make sure this was a singular instance and not impending flu or worse. So we headed back to the hotel (hence being there from 10-12) and got Miles laying down. For now he was willing to lay down which told us he wasn't feeling great. Lukas, on the other hand, was fine and probably so amped up on pure chocolate that it felt unfair to leave him in the room as well. So Grandma, Grandpa, and Lukas grabbed a boat to Disney's Hollywood Studios while we hunkered down in the hotel room. I wasn't sure what to do with myself, so I turned on the TV and we watched "Must Do" Disney for the 30th time. How bad was it? I had memorized every cheesy line, every silly expression. So had Lukas. When he watched it, he mumbled the lines under his breath. The memory on this child is frightening. Perhaps I should get him more constructive things to memorize!
2 hours later, Mousekeeping hadn't come a knocking. So we kept rocking the laying on the bed thing. but Miles had gotten bored. He was back to crawling all over the place, smiling, and generally not wanting to relax. Elisa and I decided he was probably going to be fine. Something clearly didn't agree with his stomach (Mickey's Breakfast Pizza, anyone?) but he was bouncing back. So I texted my Dad to find that they were eagerly awaiting another ride on Tower of Terror. We loaded up the stroller, caught a boat, and were in Hollywood Studios about 30 minutes later. We met up with Lukas and my parents as we arrived. I was very excited to hear about all the rides they had gone on. The grand count was...1! Lukas had wanted to go on Tower of Terror, and the line said "50 minutes". They chanced it. An hour and a half later, they had experienced the ride. And not done much else. We, on the other hand, had arrived just in time to eat lunch. That's right. Let's see how Miles can stomach italian!
This reservation was a bit unique. We would be eating at Mama Melrose's as part of Disney's Fantasmic! dinner package. Fantasmic! is a night-time show and it is generally tough to get good seats. So we decided to do the lunch package which ensures us of good seats and gets us a good meal. So when we sat down to order, the full weight of this decision was realized. You see, we specifically didn't do the Disney dining package because when you do, you get an appetizer, entree, and dessert. That's a lot of food. To get the package, we all got to order an appetizer, entree, and dessert. We got calamari, salads, mussels, chicken noodle soup, and bread. And that was just for appetizers. By the end of the meal, I was near explosion. Miles was still happy. It was time to walk off the food. We headed out of the restaurant to be greeted by life size models of Mater and Lightning McQueen. Miles was very excited about this, so we waited in line and I saw something needless. A man had been waiting outside of line for his kid to get pictures with the two cars. When it came his son's turn, he put down his beer and took some pictures. Another stranger walked up and clearly wasn't paying attention. He kicked the beer over, looked down, and was clearly embarrassed. If that was me, I would have apologized and bought the person another beer. This guy looked around and saw that I had witnessed the beer kicking. So he hightailed it away. And to put a cherry on top of the situation, this was a 50 year old man. Yeah, especially awkward to see him running away from the scene. When the beer drinker came back and saw the empty beer, he said a few choice swear words right in front of his son. I decided I would side with the 50 year old runner. Tut tut. Someone needed timeout, or a good trip through Haunted Mansion. They're really interchangeable.
I hadn't been on a ride yet, and Lukas was excited about Star Tours, so after lunch and after Lightning and Mater (which ended up scaring Miles when the car revved...good one, Disney!), we headed on. The ride was quite fun, but it was the person in front of me in line that made the experience worthwhile. I love to see how strange people can get in theme parks. This guy took the cake. As we slowly walked through the Star Tours queue, he took pictures of the most random things. Boxes in the corner. a droid that sat unmoving. A poster on the wall. I can only imagine the excitement of a slide show at his house. No pictures of the kids. Just pictures of gray walls, and a great guessing game of "which ride were we on?!" I entertained my Mom by taking iPhone photos of my feet, a gray wall, and the photographer taking a photograph of a picture of "Endor". Good memories all around. Due to the excitement of projectile vomit, however, we were deep into the day and headed back to the hotel.
[Plug Mousekeeping awkwardness here...]
It was around 5:30PM when we headed back out for dinner. There is one restaurant (literally one) that doesn't accept dining reservations in Disney World. It is a burger and malt shop in Beach Club Resort called Beaches and Cream. I had been a bit nervous about this because without a reservation, I wasn't sure what to expect. When I arrived to put our name in, I knew that my lack of planning ability was on full display. And hour and a half wait? Blech. No burger was worth that, right? Apparently that thought would come back to haunt me. So we bagged the idea of Beaches and Cream, considering that we would come back for lunch the next day if time permitted. We instead decided to head back to Disney Studios for a quick dinner at counter service. After all, we needed to be there to see Fantasmic! and I was sure that we could find some good grub.
We walked mindlessly through the park trying to find something to eat. The first two places we came across were closed (ummm....you don't serve dinner in a theme park open until 9?). Finally, we arrived at Pizza Planet. I wasn't really craving pizza, so I jumped back on the iPhone to find other options. By the time I found an alternative with burgers and sandwiches, Lukas had somehow made another friend with the cashier and was the proud owner of a cookie. Good grief. He could bat his eyes and get free food without even trying. We headed down to ABC Commissary and ordered food. I was entranced by the most unique burger item I'd ever seen. You could get the #1 combo, which was a burger and fries. Or you could go all in and get the #2, which was a burger with three fried shrimp skewered on top. Surf and turf on the cheap. I had to order it. We got our food and I sat down to my burger. Sure enough, it had three fried shrimp right on top. The picture looked better than reality. The shrimp did more to detract from the burger than add to it. I was suddenly wishing we were eating at Beaches and Cream. And I was considering writing a suggestion note to Disney that traditional surf and turf was a better option. Shrimp attached to top of burger might seem like a good idea, but really felt a bit forced. But heck, I ordered it. This is also coming from the guy that ordered nachos with beans and hates beans. I don't think I'm the poster child for stopping himself from dumb ordering.
A quick bit later, I convinced Elisa to let us ride Star Tours again. I spent the majority of time in line telling Elisa that we wouldn't have to run across the park and that we wouldn't be late for Fantasmic! By the time we got off the ride, it was 7:24PM. Fantasmic! was across the park. We'd have to book it. I used the stroller battering ram to get us there, and we got checked in. To be fair, Fantasmic! didn't start until 8:00PM, but I wanted great seats since we had gone with the package. We eventually got seated with very good seats (albeit a little more to the right than I had hoped), and hunkered in. We still had 20 minutes to spare. How would we be entertained?
And then two people came out with microphones. They had pre-show activities, to be sure. They split the audience of 5,000 into two sections. Our section was manned by an idiot male. The other was led by a sly woman who clearly knew how to entertain a crowd better. The first game we played was to finish the lyrics of popular Disney songs. It started easily enough. "Just a spoon full of sugar..." and the crowd would sing back "helps the medicine go down!" It was slightly fun to hear all the crowd sing that part, half the crowd keep going, and by the time we were 4-5 lines in, only a couple passionate Mary Poppins fans were still belting out words. And this is where things got weird. For all of her team's songs, there was plenty to sing. For us, we go "Yo Ho Yo Ho..."and could only really finish with "a pirate's life for me!" I mean, not even Johnny Depp knows the words to that song. How are we supposed to?
They moved onto picking two random people to sing solos. And to get the crowd involved, each team inherited a cheer. Again, the woman put our leader to shame. She had the crowd wave their arms back in unison. The effect was quite nice. He said our would be making monkey noises. "ooh ooh ahh". Can I please switch teams? He also picked quite possible the worst singer on Earth for our side. Literally, glass broke, children started crying, and a crazy grandma started screeching "make it stop!!!!" Okay, not really. But it could have happened. He was bad. The final game before Fantasmic! was a trivia competition. They brought two families up to compete. All of the questions were ridiculously easy. But the last one? They asked how tall Expedition Everest was in the form of a multiple choice question. The choices? 50 feet, 199.5 feet, or 5,000 feet. And true to form, the family guessed 5,000 feet. Good hell. Yep, the mountain is 5,000 feet tall. Give or take about 4,800 feet. For shame.
Finally, I was just aggravated and the start of Fantasmic! ended my suffering. Plus, as a reward to the families they gave them popcorn. Way to pay it forward, Disney! Fantasmic! was, as always, fantastic. The kids were very into it. I asked Miles after it was over what he thought. His first and only comment? It was fun, but no blue fireworks! And we're back to Day 6, ladies and gentlemen! Miles would proceed to complain loudly about no blue fireworks all the way back to the hotel. I didn't see any more fireworks on the agenda. As our boat stopped at our hotel, though, the Disney God came through. Epcot was a bit late in starting their Illuminations fireworks. When we got off the boat, we looked North. Blue fireworks were everywhere. It was as if Walt Disney himself had ordered them.
Okay, not really. But it was good timing. Miles got his fill of blue fireworks all over the place. And instead of complaining, he then couldn't stop saying "I see blue ones!" So cute. And the perfect end to what was the most imperfect day of our trip so far. Except, of course, for my ability to catch vomit in my hand. I really have grown since being a brand new father with Lukas and letting him spew spaghetti all over my chest. Now, I'm like a Major League catcher. Vomit and other bodily fluids, beware!
The trip is starting to wind down. Only 3 more days to go, one of which is a travel day. But the long slog home continues....Day 8 has many hidden treasures. Read tomorrow to see how I game the Disney system, Elisa faces the Yeti and no amount of coffee can help, we get soaked but not as soaked as those that thought they had escaped, Disney provides the strangest directions for exciting a ride ever heard, we see the kitchen sink, we get wet again, we shop til we drop, have to pay more for rides, have a dinner for the ages, and Lukas shows proper form in coughing up pool water (I was waiting with towel in hand, of course...).
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